Sh!tstorm Chronicles

/ August 26, 2015

Last night, while Maduro was rambling on TV about how he and Russia will stabilize world oil prices, the El Valle river flooded.

Before signing off from his weekly TV show, the disaster was brought to the President’s attention, and he went on to criticize the ultraderecha twitter commentators who blamed his administration for the flood. “Imbeciles” he called them. “How can they blame me for the rain that falls from the sky?”

Well, in the land of Chávez, if it stinks, it’s because the corpse is rotten.
Immediatly after Maduro’s comments, a May 2015 article surfaced around the web that called bullshit on his guilt trip. The Panampost piece warned of the risks of flooding that the works being performed along the El Valle-Coche Highway, right next to the El Valle river, would cause. It includes the testimony of an anonymous source close to Haiman el Troudi, Minister of Terrestrial Transportation and Public Works, saying that the standard land studies were not properly performed and that the Minister was in a rush to complete as many projects as possible with a complete disregard for quality.

So yes, Nicolás, it’s your fault.

Also, another gem floated to the surface along with the resident turds of El Guaire and El Valle rivers:

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59 thoughts on “Sh!tstorm Chronicles”

  1. Mierda que carajos tan inutiles vale….

    Honestamente, uno no sabe si reir o llorar

    Algun dia pasara esta desgracia? Ya van 17 annos sufriendo esta peste

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    • 40 años de vacas gordas (1940-1980), creo que todavía quedarán 23 años para equiparar las vacas flacas, o 3 años dependiendo desde donde cuentes

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      • oh dear, I want my daughter to visit Venezuela… eventually. Not under the “Chavista administration”

        Utter disgrace, they have destroyed both the infrastructure and the whole idea of the country in which I grew up in the 80s.

        I mean, clearly it wasn’t brilliant… but god! what is happening now I too much. I can’t hardly believe the news when I have the bad idea to check them

        Liked by 1 person

  4. “Imbeciles” he called them. “How can they blame me for the rain that falls from the sky?”

    This brought me the memory of that ancient sketch in the Radio Rochela Show, where chaburro “comedian” Nené Quintana would play a guy who blamed EVERYTHING on the government, and in one specific sketch, he blame the government for the rain.

    Oh, the irony.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. In my professional experience, when I see someone “passing the buck” in such a blatant way as Maduro did it equates to a person that is over his head in his position. The problem with these people is that they do not have enough self awareness to understand so they carry on belly-aching until someone fires them.

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    • The truth is that there are not may options for a middle aged banana country dictator. I don’t see him making a lot of money giving speeches.

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  8. Remember a relative who visited Caldera at La Casona and mentioned to him the extended draught that was causing fires to sprout all along the road from Los Llanos , to which Caldera retorted with a note of bitter humour ´now Ill get blamed for the lack of rain´. Its true that in Venezuela the govt gets blamed for everything , sometimes irrationally , its become a national habit . Sometimes however ( as in this case) the govt is truly to blame for contributing to the flooding of the river . Funny though how Maduro echoes in reverse Calderas complaint of 20 odd years ago.!!

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    • Well, the “blame everything on the government” was a core part of the antipolitics gangrene that went fully rampant in the 90s, paving the way to putrid mortadela’s ascension later.

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  11. And, that Metro stop will be out of actions for as long as, what, 8 years maybe? The smell should be there even longer. No money for spare parts to fix anything.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Espero que la caterva de debiles mentales que votaron por Maduro porque se pudieron comprar un tv y una lavadora tengan su ropa limpiecita y disfruten ese video en su pantalla plana bien de pinga

    Imbeciles….

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    • In the same vein, how about the people that in 1998 voted for Chavez?

      Would things be bad today had Venezuela gone another way? Almost definitely, considering that ‘Viveza criolla’ has almost been always a virtue instead of the rot that it truly is. And its insidious nature can only be detected after spending time in functioning societies.

      But anyone that read MBR-2000’s scant policy documents would know that what was coming was what we have today. Honestly, being surprised by what is occurring today in Venezuela is like a Western European surprised by the actions of Germany in the mid 1930s. It was all written in a book 10 years earlier, all you had to do was read the book. Anyone that voted in 1998, without due diligence, for Chavez loses all legitimate recourse to regret.

      Like any republican American that votes for Trump in 2016’s primaries/caucuses… Just because you are upset at the status quo does not mean you destroy everything.

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      • The cost for the constituent of being inform is TOO HIGH, in the US or in Venezuela, that is used in elections. few people will even read a program, they watch the debates. regular people will have to invest so much time and resources , that politicians use the asymmetry…So, it would happen again and in any country…

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  13. Segun lo prometido por el Comandante Eterno hace 10 años:

    “El 18 de agosto de 2005, el ex presidente Hugo Chávez hizo una promesa sorprendente. “El año que viene los invito a todos y a ti, Daniel Ortega —presidente de Nicaragua desde 2007—, te invito a que nos bañemos en el Guaire el año que viene…un sancocho, ya estamos buscando el lugar. En serio, estamos recuperando el Guaire”

    Sera que segun lo prometido se dio el bañito y el sancocho en el apestoso Guaire?

    http://elestimulo.com/climax/obras-todavia-inconclusas-chavismo/

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  14. What I would like to say to Maduro: As U.S. President Harry S. Truman said, “If you can’t stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.”

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    • The Chavernment tries to micromanage so much but is also very quick to cry out “Yo no fui.” The Chavernment wants to control as much as it can, but is not willing to accept responsibility for any
      consequences of that control. This did not begin with Maduro- he is simply repeating what Chavez did time and again.

      What are the chances that Maduro has been or will be informed in public, or in private that the work being performed on the El Valle-Coche Highway had increased the chances of flooding? Rather small, I suspect.

      Recall the 2010 drought’s effect on electrical power generation at Guri. The Chavernment’s response was that of course, consumption of electricity had increased since 1998- that was the cause of the blackouts. Then we found out that OPSIS engineers [it was OPSIS, no?] in the late 1990s had a ton of plans for hydroelectric projects – nearly all of which the Chavernment shelved for not being necessary. Yo no fui, yo no fui, you no fui.

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  15. qué mielda se ha vuelto el paíj.
    graciaj, chavijtaj, cajtrijtaj, enchufadoj y asociadoj.
    ujtedej.si que brillan.

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  17. OT but Interesting Bloomberg article today. Why after the election and who is this mysterious government official?

    “The new notes — of 500 and possibly 1,000 bolivars — are expected to be released sometime after congressional elections are held on Dec. 6, said a senior government official who isn’t authorized to talk about the plans publicly.”

    http://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2015-08-26/venezuela-said-to-ready-larger-bank-notes-as-inflation-soars

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    • “Why after the election?”

      The question answers itself.

      “Who is this mysterious government official?”

      A disgruntled public employee (there’s a lot of them around). Anonymous because people that go to the press not only get fired, but they can get visited by the SEBIN’s inquisitors and go to presion for “sabotage”.

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  20. The metro mercado is at least 20 metres higher than the river so the new construction can not be blamed on the new flooding.

    I am sure that the flood was caused by blocked drains. It rained a lot in a short space of time last night and the water flows down the mountains as Caracas is in a valley.

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    • Well, where’s joge the mayor when you need him?

      Oh, yeah, organizing rallies and marchs to cover up the dictatorship’s screw-ups.

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  23. Between the Metro Inter-Galactic Guisos and the Rio Guaire Supra-Dimensional Mordidas, I’d say att least 50 Thousand Million USD, and counting, mojon por mojon.

    http://50noticias.com/2015/05/mas-corrupcion-en-metro-de-caracas-desaparecieron-mas-de-mil-millones-de-dolares-segun-manuel-isidro-molina/

    http://www.eluniversal.com/caracas/140705/afirman-que-desaparecieron-14-mil-millones-de-plan-para-sanear-el-guai

    http://www.diariolasamericas.com/4848_venezuela/3300070_estacion-metro-caracas-lluvias.html

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  25. I sure felt sorry for that poor champo in the wheelchair (in the video). I’m with Paul per a possible cholera and/or hep outbreak sometime soon. Hope it’s just alarmist thinking, but with so much mierda floating around something has to give.

    And this: “… the standard land studies were not properly performed and that the Minister was in a rush to complete as many projects as possible with a complete disregard for quality.”

    It’s nearly fantastic that any projects got done, forget the quality. Of course you could argue that the project was only superficially “done,” since it didn’t work. As was said, no one has maintained drains etc. in CCS for ages. Sooner than later the whole thing might be a big cesspool.

    Verrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrg…!!!!

    JL

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    • La respuesta de los chaburros en esa foto es hilarante:

      “En la 4ta la gente no se quejaba de esas inundaciones, lo que pasa es que como ahora el gobierno es socialista entonces le echan la culpa hasta de la mosca que les pasa por un lado.”

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